NEANDERTHALS EXPULSE ILLEGAL IMMIGRANTS
(dpa) Southern Turkey. A group of determined Neanderthals, the Neanderthal Minute Men, repulsed the attempt of Homo sapiens to enter Europe. One of the illegal immigrants captured and repatriated to Africa, a 4 and a half foot high woman named Lucy was carrying a child. She spoke to the reporter using a medium termed ‘human language’. Though the Neanderthal Minute Men could not communicate with the Homo sapiens illegal aliens, since they only possessed a system of grunts as opposed to the element the Homo sapiens call language, the message was clear: Europe belongs to the Neanderthals and the Homo sapiens are not welcome. “Entering Europe illegally is illegal,” grunted one of the Neanderthal women. The Homo sapiens, adorned with woven clothing and beads were seeking refuge from environmental calamities in Africa in the land ruled by animal skin covered Neanderthals living in caves. The Homo sapiens brought with them the wheel and many domesticated animals but the Neanderthals want none of that. A leading Neanderthal grunt person, Lu Dops, railed against the invasion from the south, bringing with it new ideas and new thought, things that the Neanderthals had no desire to foster in THEIR Europe. “Europe must remain Neanderthal,” Dups grunted, “none of those hairless Africans should dilute the purity of our race and culture!”
Another Neanderthal leader, Tan-credo, from a central snowy area, claimed that southern Turkey was a third world region that should be separated from the pure Neanderthal parts of the north. Despite his non-Neanderthal sounding name and looks, Tan-credo insisted on the purity of the race and the menace from the foreign Homo sapiens with their propensity to decorate cave walls with useless drawings which they called ‘art’ in their “language”. “True Neanderthals worship might over mental, brawn over brains!” he declared in a dpa interview. “I am a red-blooded Neanderthal whose parents came here and became true Neanderthals without those warm-hearted liberals!”
Footnote to this news flash: Several tens of thousands of years later, the Homo sapiens made the Neanderthal extinct, extending civilization around the world, developed language into a universal tool, created many useless things like music, literature, poetry, painting, sculpture, science and more. Lu Dops and Tan-credo became meaningless fossils in the record of the Neanderthal.